As all Christians have [I assume] i have a couple of "project people" that Goad has chosen for me. Let me tell you the story about one of mine* imagine tacky flashback sequence*
When the kids started at their little country school [14 kids] 2 years ago, There was [is] a father out there who is the ultimate "poor me, everyone is against me" drama king.
His daughter, Sally* [9] and Rose hit it off straight away. So because of this, Dave* and his wife Doris* started talking to me at the school gate as we waited for our kids, about how everyone at the school bullies their kids [Including their son, Sid*,12] because they are different. And it's the teachers fault because they let the kids bully them, and actualy pick on the kids themselves yadda yadda blah blah.
They are typical yokels, but their kids seemed ok.
I listened to them, but didn't really take much notice of what they said. It was obvious from the start that they were "poor me, everyone is against me" people.

A couple of weeks after starting school, Sally wanted to come over for a sleepover. Seen as they live out of town, i agreed to go and get her.

We sat down and had coffee [i think it was coffee lol] and i asked them why they don't allow their kids to take part in scripture class, or even be within earshot! Dave then went into this big rant about how evil God is and why. He doesn't want his kids exposed to such curruptness etc. He spoke about "God" actualy meaning "Dog" and all this hellish stuff that blended together. Daves heart was cold and hard and ugly! Well, As i sat there listening to him, i felt sick and actualy started shaking [and i don't get un-nerved very easily!] What he was saying to me about God was ugly and sickening and i just wanted to get up, run to my car and drive home as quickly as possible!

And i pretty much did that. But as i walked out, i said to him, "So do you keep your kids away from scripture because they would find it confronting? Or because it will challange you?" And he said, "Both". I told him that i [And my home] am a God fearing Christian, and if Sally was to come to my place. We wouldn't hide that from her. So they'll be sending her there knowing that. They said that Rose was Sallys only freind basicly, so they'll wear that.

I came home and vowed i'd never go back. I had nightmares about the guy and everything! I felt sick when i thought about him and what he said!

But as usual, God had other ideas....

He told me that i would be going back to Daves, and even though God didn't expect me to be Daves best freind, God wanted me to be the light in Daves life. God wanted me to stand for him.

Well now the story of Jonah springs to mind? No. I listened to God and i have been a freind to Daves family. I have done my best to be the light that God requires. I hear him out when he needs to rant some more about God and his worthlesness. But i don't really feel sick anymore [once i did. I actualy lost sleep over something he said] God gives me the words i need to stop Dave in his tracks. Dave appears to think about what i'm saying to him.

His wife, Doris, just goes along with everything Dave says. [I like Doris, but she's kinda Daves little Robot. I feel sorry for her] His kids are too scared to have an opinion of their own. Dave is quite intimidating, and when his kids even look like they might be straying from his opinions, he veraly hammers them into the ground! And their son, Sid, has actualy just starting agreeing with his dad just because it's easier. And he defends what his dad says, with a passion!

But Sally is a different story. I believe she is the key to Gods plan for this family. Sally defends what her dad says as well. But when she comes to our place, she shows curiosity towards scripture. As i told Dave from the beginning that i wouldn't hide our beliefs from Sally, that gives me free reign to read biblical bedtime stories, include Sally and her family in our dinner time Grace, play biblical games, and talk to my kids in front of her about how awesome Jesus is. Even way more than usual! [lol]

Sally sometimes asks stuff, but she always says at the end of the question, "Please don't tell dad i said anything!" And i say i won't.

I don't do anything that can be interpreted as trying to "twist" their daughter around. As they are "poor me, everyone is against me" people, i'm veeeery careful of how i approach everything with Sally.

Rose has started to not like Sally very much because she's bossy [usual kids stuff] So it's up to God to work on Roses heart about that now.

With the school stuff, i've kinda become the meat in the sandwich! The other parents want Dave out because he keeps approaching the kids and threatening them over them bullying his kids. The other parents keep writing letters to the education department about his conduct. And they keep hassling me to write about tiny things he's done to me [Nothing major, and i deal with it myself] Like the time Sid and Rose had an arguement and Dave came over to my place the next day to convince me that it was some other boys saying mean things to Rose, and they told her it was Sid who said it [Sid & Sally can't do anything wrong you see]. And i said that Rose heard Sid say it, as it was to her face. And i only know what Rose has told me. We sorted it out that day, so why then send a letter to the education department? So i'm kinda being shuned for not complying with the other 6 families in order to get rid of Dave. But i'm also Daves only sounding board outside of his home and he wants to feel that someone is on his side.When he talks to me about this stuff, i can feel his pain. He really feels that he's just trying to do the right thing by his kids. It's his reality, and i feel empathy for him.So there's never a good time to say something like, "Look, i really don't want to talk about this school stuff."

I'm not on anyones "Side" I know that the other families are over reacting a little sometimes, and i know that Dave is mostly blowing things out of proportion. But why should i have to take a side?

Last night there was a P & C meeting [PTA] at the school, and i knew it was an ambush waiting for Dave, because he had gone to a mothers house when he knew her husband wasn't home, and threatened her because her boys were supposedly picking on Sid [amoung other things]

The fathers were at the meeting for the first time, and it just turned into a big verbal brawl! I didn't go because i knew what was going to happen. I hated not being able to warn Dave beforehand, but on the other hand i knew he needed to face the concequences of his actions.

Dave called me as soon as he got home from the meeting to tell me about his "persicution".

He also told me that i was accused of spreading nasty rumours at the meeting, and about what. And he said one of the dads called me a fat bitch. I kinda just told him it was a shame that they didn't get the issues sorted out, and i got off the phone.

But straight away, i called 3 people who were at that meeting and got them to call me back. [I got answering machines as they were still at the meeting.]

None of what Dave said was true at all, about me.

I know that he just really wants someone to be on his side, and he wanted me to be just as annoyed with these people as he is. But that's taking it too far. He hurt me with that. He said things happened that he know would upset me, for his own selfish gain, and that hurt.

I dreamt about him all last night. And i've tried to make sense out of what motivated him to do that on a deeper level.

I thought about confronting him and letting him know that that's not on. That no matter what his beef is with other people, it's not called for to hurt someone like that in order to manipulate them. But by now he believes those lies himself. Nothing surer! Knowing that's his thought pattern, if i confront him, Then i'll be the enemy too. The other parents would haven't "gotten to me".

When i woke up this morning, i knew God still wanted me in Daves life [Darn! lol]

So i'm going to have to tell him that i don't want to talk about school issues with him any more. I don't want to hear about them. Considering that's seriously the only thing he likes to talk about, this'll be a very interesting twist in the relationship. I'll report here when i've found the right moment :o)

*Not their real names :o)